Matablog

Archive for the 'your phone’s off the hook (but I’m not)' Category

Found! The Real Party Doctor!

By Andrew Earles on Monday, April 28th, 2008

A little more malevolent than my mental pic of the good doc, but still follows the script. I’d like to think he’d ride the deer to safety or something….

Missing man found dressed like doctor with dead deer in stolen ambulance

Sun-Sentinel
Posted September 28 2005, 9:43 AM EDT

JACKSONVILLE — A man reported missing from a Florida hospital was found in

North Carolina dressed like a doctor and driving a stolen ambulance with a dead

deer wedged in the back, authorities said.

Leon Holliman Jr., 37, was reported missing from a River Region Human Services

facility in Jacksonville last month. The North Carolina State Highway Patrol found

him driving the ambulance with the deer on Sunday.

“I don’t know how the man got it up in there,” said Sgt. Robert Pearson. “It

was a six point buck.”

It wasn’t known where Holliman got the deer, which had been dead for some time, Pearson said.

Authorities tracked the stolen ambulance through three rural North Carolina counties and one county in southern Virginia before its tires were punctured and it wound up in a ditch, Pearson said.

Holliman was admitted to a North Carolina hospital for a psychiatric evaluation. Police said they would decide whether to charge Holliman after that evaluation is complete.

Shat In The (Linkin Park’s) Van!!

By Andrew Earles on Tuesday, November 6th, 2007

No square inch of scenery left to chew, no square inch of Shatner’s ass to kiss, and no clips of the interview on YouTube yet, but one can enjoy Mike Patton exploring everything that happened in music between The Infectious Grooves and Linkin Park!

YouTube Preview Image

If The Ponys Radio Budget Gets Zero’d, Let’s Buy More Banners

By Adam F on Thursday, January 11th, 2007

Gerard vs Bear is reporting that the FCC is "proposing! SHIIIT" to help get radio broadcasters off the payolapayola.jpg hook.  

While details of the Enforcement Bureau's proposal were sketchy, sources said that radio station groups would be required to set aside a certain amount of airtime for music produced independently. The radio groups also would agree to a code of conduct and an education program, the sources said. As part of the deal, the radio broadcasters would not admit to any wrongdoing. 

Education?  Codes of conduct?  No more trips to see Nickelback live at Squaw Valley?  Exoneration at a high cost for the Hinder-hugging-set.  And all Pete Doherty had to do was write a hot single.

Full details, and some banner ads targeting you if you happen to be a member of the Academy, at HollywoodReporter.com.

On CSpan’s Xmas List :

By Gerard on Tuesday, December 5th, 2006
YouTube Preview Image
A 7 second delay. Or a competent call screener. 
(one of the greatest songs of all time, massacred, mp3)

To Hell With The Cell : Nawlins Docs Say Extreme Gabbers Are Shooting Blanks

By Gerard on Tuesday, October 24th, 2006

MagicRocks.JPG

(a photograph of a sperm sample would be highly inappropriate for a family blog such as this, so let's enjoy the wonders of Sea Monkeys, instead!)

From the Guardian's Ian "I'd Like To Collect A" Sample.

Men who use mobile phones for long periods at a time may be at risk of damaging their sperm, according to research by American scientists.Samples taken from men attending a fertility clinic revealed that their sperm declined steadily in number, quality and ability to swim as mobile phone usage increased. Where men used their mobiles for more than four hours a day, researchers found a 30% drop in sperm motility or movement and viability when compared with men who did not use a mobile phone.

Scientists believe the study is too preliminary to prove an unequivocal link between mobile phones and falling sperm counts, but the work received a cautious welcome from other scientists who called for further studies to rule out other factors known to influence sperm quality, such as age, weight, smoking, stress and whether people had sedentary jobs.

Ashok Agarwal, who presented his findings at the American Society for Reproductive Medicine conference in New Orleans, stressed the study did not prove mobile phones were damaging male fertility, but urged scientists to investigate the possibility.

On behalf of the cellular phone industry, I'd like to challenge these finding. Not me, personally (I stood too close to a microwave oven while watching "Three's Company" as a youngster, and well, the rest is history), but there's a mountain of evidence that runs contrary to Dr. Argwai's claims.  For instance, Lee Atwater hasn't impregnated anyone in years.