Matablog

Archive for the 'the customer is always wrong' Category

Sorry, Our Psychic Quit In 1995

By Gerard on Friday, June 29th, 2012

Date: June 22, 2012 4:39:48 AM EDT

Dear (NAME REDACTED)

I don’t speak very well english, because I’m french, but I’ll try.
I have a problem with old albums of the matador’s group between 1996 and 2005.
Is a psychic at matador in this years ?
I found my life in a lot of albums, like belle and sebastian, you, and others groups.
The more big problem is the group “Fuck” band, where all the CD’s “Pardon my french” turn around my private life.
Is there a psychic who help you to do your album at Matador betwenn 1996 and 2005.
Do you know a psychic who could do that ?
Thanks.

(NAME REDACTED)

Rage of the mastering engineers

By Patrick on Friday, January 29th, 2010

The pent-up frustration of mastering and recording engineers who have had to deal with members of an ignorant public for years has finally found in an outlet in a series of viral YouTube videos featuring computer animated characters speaking in computer-generated English accents.

The videos are brilliant, and point to the REAL revolution in the music industry over the past two decades, which is the proliferation of affordable (if often crappy) home-recording solutions. Someone needs to tell all those newspaper reporters that ProTools and GarageBand have had at least as much effect on the industry as P2P and torrents. It’s hard to believe now, but in 1980 it cost a lot of money even to cut a 2-song hardcore single. Analog recording is slow, expensive and requires a ton of skill. Actually, the same goes for decent digital recording, but it’s a hell of a lot cheaper and faster than it used to be. There are now approximately 200 times as many releases coming out annually as there were in 1980, and that doesn’t even account for the huge quantity of music that doesn’t see a commercial release and just lives on MySpace pages, YouTube videos and CDRs.

The above video would be enlightening and hilarious all on its own, but there are tons more. The videos have apparently struck a chord: “OMFG classic bigtime relate to this!” and “BAHAHAAAAA.  I am approached by so many douche-bags like that guy all the time. Stupid FruityLooping, clip-activating, preset-selecting chumps!!!”

Enjoy:

Jon. Wow. I have to say you really made those beats bang. Bro. Bro. Get me?

Manufacturing Error Or Major Improvement? – Mark E. Smith’s Latest Crossover Move

By Gerard on Saturday, February 28th, 2009

Brian Turner supplied the link to the story below, which is as good an excuse as any to mention that WFMU’s annual fundraiser starts this Monday, March 2 and runs until March 15.   From the Sun

THEY may share the same surname but that’s it for similarities between angelic Britain’s Got Talent teen FARYL SMITH and gnarled FALL frontman MARK E SMITH.

So imagine Universal Records’ surprise when they received the first shipment of Faryl’s debut CD from the pressing plant.

A cock-up in production meant that instead of delicate balladry in the honeyed tones of their recently signed youngster, what actually ended up on discs bearing her artwork and info were the grumblings of Mark and his fellow Manc veterans’ 2008 album Imperial Wax Solvent.

Needless to say, Universal chiefs weren’t best pleased.

My spy tells me: “They had ordered hundreds of copies and they were staggered by what was on it.

“They have had severe words with the pressing plant.”

Careful followers of Matador quality control are aware we’ve only made mistakes like that about a half dozen times in our history.  

Let The Class Action Suit Against Bruce Hornsby Start Here

By Gerard on Wednesday, July 23rd, 2008

Canadian Virginia-spawned vocalist/keyboardist Bruce Hornsby is no stranger to untruth-in-advertising. For years, he fronted a band optimistically known as The Range  when they had little to speak of. Now, he’s hitting the summer shed/state fair circuit as the face and voice behind The Noisemakers.

Though a number of mainstream musicians have flexed their avant chops before (Pat Metheny, Norah Jones’ collaborations with the Bunnybrains, anytime Ashlee Simpson sings without autocue, etc.) I submit there is no greater stretch in hyperbole history than Bruce Hornsby calling his band The Noisemakers.