Archive for the 'it takes money to make money (honey)' Category

What do you do between 9 and 5?

By Michael on Wednesday, September 16th, 2009

I’ve had some stupid ideas for this company, sure, but don’t you think this is taking it too far??


UK Auto Insurance Co. : Unfamiliar With Iggy’s “Personal Life”

By Gerard on Monday, February 23rd, 2009

At least when Geico refuses to insure cavemen, no one can accuse them of hypocrisy. From Monday’s Daily Mail :

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In the Swiftcover TV advertisements, 61-year-old Iggy prances around topless as he boasts: ‘I got it Swiftcovered. I got insurance on my insurance. Do it. Get a life. Get Swiftcovered.’

But musicians who applied for cover were told their occupation made them ineligible. They are now complaining to the Advertising Standards Authority.

Tim Soong, the 30-year-old bass guitarist in Roguetune, found that ‘entertainers’ are excluded from cover.

Mr Soong, of Kennington, phoned the Guildford-based company, which is part of the Axa insurance group, and said: ‘The customer services operator told me that they don’t insure musicians.

‘When I mentioned Iggy Pop, she said his case was different because he is American.

Part-time music producer Felix Wright, 36, of Maidstone, Kent, has also made a complaint after being turned down for cover on his BMW.

He said: ‘When I asked what Iggy Pop did for a living if I was being rejected as a musician, they said they did not know his personal life and he was not one of their policy holders.’

The Mail’s report adds that prior to Iggy’s commercials, Swiftcover used “Death Wish” director Michael Winner in their advertisements, despite refusing to cover film directors.

Dude From The Non-Lansing Fix(x) Doesn’t Like The Toyota Commercial, Either

By Gerard on Wednesday, November 12th, 2008

Toyota’s recent “Saved By Zero” spots have inspired everything from Facebook hate groups to actual killing sprees (ok, not yet, BUT JUST YOU WAIT) and is it any wonder that an individual most likely to profit from this aesthetic atrocity agrees that it sucks? From the Las Vegas Journal’s Jerry Fink :

“I would prefer to have been the one singing it,” Cy Curnin says during a recent phone interview from his farm in France. You can hear the real version when the Fixx performs free concerts Friday and Saturday at Green Valley Ranch.

He’s amused at the irony of using the song to tout 0 percent car financing.

“It’s a bit cheesy,” he says. “It was about looking at your own life, not so much about amassing material things but about experiences that lend you to be blissful. It’s peeling away illusions we pick up along the way. Our identity isn’t the suit we wear or the latest gadget. Our identity is the freedom to pick and choose from all aspects of humanity and to make a stand.

“The song was written from the point of view of the release you get when you have nothing left to lose. It’s sort of a meditation. It clears your head of all fears and panics and illusions and you get back to the basics, which is a Buddhist mantra, which I practiced back then, and which I still do. The idea of the song is how great it is to get back to zero.”

The theme drives Curnin’s life.

Several years ago he moved to France with his new wife and started living off the land and off royalties.

“We are 100 percent self-sufficient,” says Curnin, a native of Wimbledon, England. “We’re getting back to the roots of it. My wife runs a guesthouse. We run all of the stuff we grow and produce through the guesthouse, feeding people. Tonight there are six people who will be eating some of our pigs.”

Nordstrom’s : Totally Undaunted By The Failure Of The Mogwai Truss

By Gerard on Thursday, May 8th, 2008

Lavender Diamond’s Ron Rege writes, “we knew were were going to have a song on a JC Penny commercial, but this looks like some joke on the Matablog!”

Hey, if America’s department stores wanna take further tips from the nation’s foremost source for music-related advertorial bulletins, we’re more than up for it. In this instance, however, Nordstorm should just send the cash directly to Becky, Ron and Steve. Or at the very least, a gift certificate.

Why I Need $360,000,000,000

By Howard on Thursday, May 1st, 2008

Charles Ray Fuller: Aspiring Hip-Hop Label Entrepreneur?


Look at his face. This man is HIGH AS SHIT. But then again, you’d have to be (this) high to start a record label. Is there any more ambitious way to fund a label startup? Who else is dying to hear the records he intended to release?

Not since William G. McAdoo handed to Lord Cunliffe, Governor of the Bank of England, a Treasury warrant for $200,000,000, have I heard of anyone attempting to cash out this much scratch.

The Dallas Morning News lays out the mind-fucking facts:

A man has been accused of attempting to pass a $360 billion check, which he claims was given to him by his girlfriend’s mother to start a record business, Fort Worth police said.

Charles Ray Fuller, 21, of Crowley, was arrested on April 22 on an accusation of forgery, police said.

The personal check was not made out to Mr. Fuller and when the bank contacted the check owner, the woman said she did not write a check for $360 billion.

Mr. Fuller was also accused of unlawful carrying of a weapon and possession of marijuana, Lt. Henderson said. He may also face a theft charge in Crowley.

Lt. Henderson said he did not know if Mr. Fuller and his girlfriend were still together.

Vanishing NY on Starbucks’ Reappearing Old Logo

By Gerard on Wednesday, April 16th, 2008

Why is Starbucks bringing its vagina dentata out of hiding and into plain sight right now? Maybe they were inspired by the hilarious and brilliant film Teeth. Maybe they hope consumers are more comfortable with exhibitionism than they used to be. Maybe they’re thinking sex sells.

But more likely, they’re frightened and in need of protection.

Images of women exposing their genitals were used by primitive peoples to drive away evil spirits, calm rough seas, and scare away enemies with the threat of castration. In the face of a recession, Starbucks is banking on the power of the vagina dentata to work its ancient magic and keep the wolf from their door. – Jeremiah Moss, Vanishing New York

There’s a Chock Full O’ Nuts joke in here somewhere, but it’s way too early on a Wednesday morning.

Design Your Own Love Of Diagrams Tee

By Gerard on Tuesday, November 6th, 2007

Or hoodie, tank top, shorts or badge.  Love Of Diagrams are currently touring the US with Enon, but if you miss the show and want to make your friends think you actually turned up (hint, hint), this might be the way to go.

Q: How Many Copies Of Wilco’s ‘Sky Blue Sky’ Can You Fit Into A VW?

By Gerard on Wednesday, June 6th, 2007

A: Depends. Do you mean the double vinyl version, the standard CD or the CD/DVD configuration?


With Wilco's decision to license new music to Volkswagen, there's been a bit of knee-jerktastic reaction on the worldwidewebby thing, and in the midst of such hysteria, Jeff Tweedy's brother-in-law Danny Miller writes, "from the outcries I’ve seen on several sites, you’d think Wilco had licensed “She’s a Jar” to sell Kraft mayonnaise, “Nothing’s Ever Gonna Stand In My Way” to hawk Viagra, or “I’m the Man Who Loves You” to promote the North American Man-Boy Love Association."

Not that there'd be anything wrong with that. Earlier in his post, Miller tackles VW's historical roots.

I was waiting to see how long it would take the increasingly hysterical fans on the Wilco site to mention Volkswagen’s checkered past. It happened on page 11 of the thread and then flared up big time. Yes, Volkswagen was a large German company that obviously had ties to the Third Reich during World War II. It’s not a history that they hide nor is it one that they stress (to do so would be marketing suicide). Of course there is no connection today between the Volkswagen Company of America (the sponsors of the current spots) and National Socialism but I’ll leave it at that—I have no interest in becoming an apologist for the past moral failings of Volkswagen or any other company. On the other hand, if I was meting out judgment, I might hurl even more at the American companies that got into bed with the Nazis in the 1930s and 40s such as the Ford Motor Company which was headed by the vile anti-Semite Henry Ford. I’d also ponder the cowardice of the Jewish movie moguls in Hollywood who were so worried about offending the lucrative German market after Hitler first took power that they would make it a point to always show Germans in a good light and to avoid making films with Jewish themes. And how about the questionable wartime activities of the Coca-Cola company as it exploited its successful German market even during the war?

Excellent points all around, sir.   Everyone is entitled to make his or her own decision about which companies they support (hey, like ours!) and what is or isn't morally defensible. And while I personally have no quarrel with Wilco being paid by Volkswagen (just so long as they got paid a bundle — helps the rest of us trying to establish market value), I would encourage everyone reading this to boycott the Ford Motor Company.  True, the Henry Ford Era was a long time ago, but the company continues it's association with a contemporary figure almost as virulent  — Toby Keith. 

Kicked In The Head : Doc Martens’ Cavalcade Of Dead Rockers

By Gerard on Thursday, May 24th, 2007


I have but two thoughts regarding Doc Martens' ill-advised new campaign (link swiped from Boing Boing) ; 

1) Who'd have thought the executors of the GG Allin estate would exercise such restraint?

2) At least DM didn't select Shannon Hoon.  

To Quote Rainier Luftwaffe Wolfcastle….

By Gerard on Tuesday, April 3rd, 2007

…you can't sell out when you never stood for anything in the first place. From the New York Times' Robert Levine, April 2, '07.


Fans of Fall Out Boy who downloaded “Thnks Fr Th Mmrs,” the rock band’s new video last weekend most likely enjoyed the spectacle of chimpanzees playing filmmakers and mocking the members of the band. But they may have noticed something else: Tag All Nighter, a deodorant body spray aimed at young men, is featured prominently in the video.

Procter & Gamble, which owns Tag, made a deal with the band’s label, Island Records, to make the video available for free downloading from the band’s Web site before it could be seen anywhere else.

Since CD sales are declining but the cost of making a video is not, many musicians have made product placement deals for videos in the last few years. In this deal, Tag essentially underwrote the cost of those downloads for a limited time and put a message to that effect on the band’s Web site. Tag also promoted the band in advertising and helped offset the cost of making the video.

Fall Out Boy was comfortable with Tag because the brand’s ads have a “sarcastic spin,” said Pete Wentz, the band’s bassist and lyricist. “Given how the industry is right now, you have to come up with new kinds of partnerships, and when you’re able to offset the cost of the video, that’s cool. Hiring chimps is not cheap.”